She'd Attend Post Graduate Seminars if You'd Let Her

5/21/2015

I'm terrified, really. In a few short months her daily therapies will end and she will begin Kindergarten. Is she ready? Of course, that kid was born ready. She'd attend post-graduate seminars if you'd let her. We are all equal in her eyes. This is not about her being ready for the world. This is about the world being ready for her.

We've tried to prepare you for her. We've told you she's likely to hug you upon meeting you and we've told you she is a fearless and stealthy ninja but have we told you that she cries when she is confused? Have we told you that she comes on strong and she'll need help making friends? Have we told you that she can express so much more language than she can understand?

There is so much more you need to know. How can I make sure you know these things?

Did you know that hitting and crying and screaming and running are forms of communication for her? She'll try and tell you what she needs a number of times before she resorts to these methods but even the ninja has limits. You might get hit. I know it isn't okay. I just hope you know she feels there is no other option to make you understand. Can you imagine her frustration?

Her vocabulary has exploded. We are so beyond grateful for her words. We hope you know, as thrilling as her words are, they are unreliable.

What if the kids scrunch their noses up at her. "Who is this rambunctious little girl, with her superhero t-shirts and her boy short hair?"

"Why is she so loud?"

"Why does she cry like a baby?"

"Why doesn't she sit still?"

I know you'll love her, I know you'll help her peers to understand her, but I hope you all have patience for her, too, because, as I have learned, they are two very different things.

I'm sure I'll write to you again in the coming months. I'll sleep less and less and you'll assure me that she'll be loved and cared for like any child. I'll smile and assure you that I know, but the truth is; I am scared.

9 Comments

Brenda

5/21/2015 02:18:34 am

i wrote a three page document about my daughter and gave it to her teacher at the open house before kindergarten. The teacher really appreciated it. They were very understanding when she spent most of her time sitting under the table. Please consider doing the same for your precious ninja.

Melinda Brown

5/21/2015 03:32:50 am

Shanell - I have an "About Me" booklet form I can e-mail to you if you think it will help. I filled one out chock full of info for Lila's teacher this Fall... other than that I don't know what else to do. Wait and see, hope for the best, and pray I suppose. Lots of love to you, Kate, and the rest of your beautiful family as well!

rosemary

5/26/2015 05:18:06 am

Hi Melinda..I would love to have a link for those booklets my daughter is 5 starting kindergarten this year

OHANAFITNESS

5/21/2015 01:18:23 pm

05.21.2015
I 1st read the article on Yahoo about the photographs taken by your daughter. I then followed the link to your site.
I cried as I read it.
Why did I cry? It is very similar to how I describe my soon to be 4 1/2-yr old son.

Every daycare Center that he has been in attendance at: I created a: get To Know You Document, About My Child Document, An Additional document outlining additional Strategies/Tools on how to work with my child, etc.
Everything is has Bullet Points and Color Coded.
I hope this suggestion helps you and your family.
I have found that these documents in this format helps: Therapists, Doctors, etc.
Does it help the Teachers? The good ones, Yes.
You have to spell it out for the Teachers and Staff; Do Not assume that they know, all children are unique and have different triggers.

I know I have fears of what my son will go through when he begins his journey into Kindergarten.

Warmest Regards.

DeAnna

5/21/2015 09:13:48 pm

Reading this hits home for me. My son Alex is going to kindergarten in Sept. He was just recently diagnosed and has been getting OT therapy. I go today for his IEP at the school - i got there report yesterday and it broke my heart. Being scared for him- yup i am. I see some of the things the teachers are saying at home but not all of them. I know they try and i know he exasperates them at times. I know he has a hard time making friends. He is compulsive, he gets overwhelmed and can yell when upset. He has the whole sensory disorder as well so can bump and hit....he always wants to chew. I am scared that he won't be accepted too. Good luck to your beautiful girl- and good luck to Alex- they are both so sweet and special.

Jessie

5/21/2015 11:59:49 pm

Thank you so much for writing this. My son starts school in the fall as well with many of the same issues...We go next month to get him tested to see if he's on the spectrum.
Thank you all for the ideas to write an "About me" for the teacher. I was wondering how I was going to lay it all out there for her.
Good luck to all of you! It's nice to know i'm not alone.

Wendy Jackson link

5/22/2015 03:23:36 pm

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Laura link

5/22/2015 05:25:24 pm

Hi - I've just found your site and your post took me back some 13 years when my autistic son started preschool. The fears, the letting go, the walking away knowing that my angel was being cared for by others.... How could they know him like I do? How could they love him the same way? How could I leave him???? They were the hardest steps I ever took - in fact I sat in a coffee shop the entire three hours just half a block away from the school just waiting for someone to come and get me (no cell phones then)! I know how you're feeling and although we've never met please believe that my thoughts are with you and on the day I'll be sending you huge love and light to see you through. We've shared our lives with autism for 16 years now and there isn't much we haven't experienced.... If you want me to email me, please do .... any time. From one warrior mom to another .... respect. xxx

Alecia Whitmill

5/30/2015 04:50:02 am

I am a teacher. I am certified in exceptional student education k-12 as well as elementary education k-6. I have also managed a special needs summer camp for years at the YMCA. I wanted to comment to let you know that most teachers will do whatever it takes to help your child succeed. Giving the teacher a booklet about your child would help tremendously! Your child is a unique gift from God! She'll be a blessing to her teacher and her classmates! It won't be easy. Everyone will need time to adjust. Please offer your help as a volunteer in the classroom. This will give you an opportunity to see what the routines are and how to help your child through her school day. You could be there to show the teacher her unique signals that she needs a sensory break. Many teachers don't understand how necessary that is and that each child's sensory needs are different. She may need a picture schedule. She can take the pics! This might help relieve stress and get to know her new surroundings. She could also photograph her classmates and room. This might help facilitate talks, new vocabulary, names! It might help to meet the teacher early. I'm praying your daughter has a wonderful experience. The students with autism I have taught changed my life and my heart forever. I'm no expert but I am always open and willing to learn. They don't teach autism in college. Know this, you are the expert, you must advocate for your baby and also be open to new ideas! Love to you and your beautiful angel!

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She'd Attend Post Graduate Seminars if You'd Let Her

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